Monday, April 19, 2010

beginning to feel content

I think I am coming into a new place in life. I have struggled with being overwhelmed and stretched too thin for a long time. It has been a painfully hard process to learn to take care of me and to say no when feeling too overwhelmed. I am learning to build boundaries- in all types of relationships in my life. This is a continual growth process. And can I just say growing is hard!!!!

I have taken a step back and had to examine my life. The things I do and say and feel. Its been a rough road and I have had to make some tough decisions. I have had to draw boundary lines in order to protect me. I know I may not have handled this in the best way and may have been harsh and drastic at times, but I was drowning and had to fix it quick.

I feel alone and misunderstood in this process. Mostly because I don’t share life too well. I don’t want people to think I cant handle life. And some of it is because I have been hurt in the process of sharing life. In this learning process, I am trying to trust more and open up to people. But I find that few people actually get me.

I have been so blessed by a handful of friends who have known me for years and truly get the inner workings of me and my brain. I have been blessed with a handful of new friends who also do the same.

I finally feel at a good place in life. I am learning to be me and to embrace the Child of God that I am. I know this process has been hard and painful and is nowhere near over, but it has been so good!

I have an amazing family that loves and supports me no matter what. From my parents to my grandparents; to my siblings; and to aunts, uncles, and cousins. I know I can always count on them for love and laughter and encouragement.

I have an amazing group of friends who truly get me and understand me…even when I don’t. they have been there through all the ups and downs…

I have my newer friends who have let me just be me and grow through this rough time.

I have a Father who loves me.

I have all I need.

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