Tuesday, April 27, 2010

one of those days

have you ever had one of those days where it is nothing but awful from start to finish?

today was my day.

late to work
forgot i had to do sub plans
both copy machines were broken
had to meet with vp
layoff hearing from 9-6
had to "testify" at hearing
broke a nail
came home to order two dresses from a website to help out
due to complications and errors...i was charged SEVEN times
which that 800 dollars has overdrawn my account
nothing they can do for 4 days
issues with family and friends
drama
hurt

when it rains it pours

but thanks to a good friend...encouragement was shared. reminded of the hope i have in HIM

my prayer...take my life and let it be everything for YOUR glory because when everything falls apart YOUR arms hold me together

glory to God

in all things may i bring glory to GOD


Monday, April 19, 2010

beginning to feel content

I think I am coming into a new place in life. I have struggled with being overwhelmed and stretched too thin for a long time. It has been a painfully hard process to learn to take care of me and to say no when feeling too overwhelmed. I am learning to build boundaries- in all types of relationships in my life. This is a continual growth process. And can I just say growing is hard!!!!

I have taken a step back and had to examine my life. The things I do and say and feel. Its been a rough road and I have had to make some tough decisions. I have had to draw boundary lines in order to protect me. I know I may not have handled this in the best way and may have been harsh and drastic at times, but I was drowning and had to fix it quick.

I feel alone and misunderstood in this process. Mostly because I don’t share life too well. I don’t want people to think I cant handle life. And some of it is because I have been hurt in the process of sharing life. In this learning process, I am trying to trust more and open up to people. But I find that few people actually get me.

I have been so blessed by a handful of friends who have known me for years and truly get the inner workings of me and my brain. I have been blessed with a handful of new friends who also do the same.

I finally feel at a good place in life. I am learning to be me and to embrace the Child of God that I am. I know this process has been hard and painful and is nowhere near over, but it has been so good!

I have an amazing family that loves and supports me no matter what. From my parents to my grandparents; to my siblings; and to aunts, uncles, and cousins. I know I can always count on them for love and laughter and encouragement.

I have an amazing group of friends who truly get me and understand me…even when I don’t. they have been there through all the ups and downs…

I have my newer friends who have let me just be me and grow through this rough time.

I have a Father who loves me.

I have all I need.